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by Beepocalypse



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Timelines, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blackmail, Blood and Gore, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Gen, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Kidnapping, Kinks, Mutual Pining, Past Child Abuse, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:41:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25703755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beepocalypse/pseuds/Beepocalypse
Summary: Pulled out of the world she knows, Noah finds herself entangled in the life of the Winchesters at the hands of the angels Castiel and Gabriel. Why? Neither she nor the boys will find out for a long time, as Castiel himself even comes to "forget." In an entirely new reality in which she wasn't supposed to exist, what will come of her adventures with her newfound family?  Will they find out who/what she really is? As her love for the boys grows immeasurably, theirs seems to grow for her just the same. Adding a third to their dynamic duo was never going to be easy, but will it be worth it in the end?
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 5





	1. Advent

**Author's Note:**

> Alright so this is my first time writing fanfiction in a VERY long time, and I'm not sure how to approach it so here's my attempt. Basically, I'm adding a main female character to Supernatural and changing the timeline to fit with her presence. She has a complex backstory, and a strong personality I'm hoping can be relatable. There will be some complex relationships between her and other characters already a part of Supernatural that develop as the story progresses. I plan to follow the timeline of the show as closely as possible, while still adding some new and original content/plot points. Please let me know what you think if you decide to give it a read, and if you have any critiques PLEASE don't be afraid because I'm still new here. I hope you enjoy it! More chapters to come (:
> 
> Of course, I do not own ANY of the content or characters of the show Supernatural. The only original character belonging to me is the character of Noah and her personal arc.

The wind was particularly sharp tonight, as it pushed against Noah’s forward stride. She pulled her overcoat tighter around her and decided to adorn the gloves she had tucked in her pockets. Still wearing her suit and heels from the trial, she wished she would have gone home to change before taking a walk, but she felt she needed to clear her head, cold or otherwise. It was hard to fathom why she felt she didn’t belong, especially when her teammates practically worshiped her for her ruthlessness as a mock attorney, and loved having her around for parties and social events. For some reason, the trial just hadn’t sat right with her; she felt as though she were the only one in that courtroom truly alive and conscious, and it perplexed her deeply, considering she felt that way nearly every day of her life. She ducked under the bend in the iron-rod fence surrounding the Mount Hope cemetery, and began to walk down the familiar path leading to the oldest headstones. Eventually, she came across her favorite headstone, belonging to a Mrs. Wardell. She was buried in 1845, making her grave one of the oldest of the thousands that spanned the place. Her long since faded headstone sat just at the roots of a large tree, now barren of leaves due to the harsh New York winter. She sat next to the headstone, against the tree, wondering if Mrs. Wardell struggled with the same inner demons that Noah did, all those years ago. After a little while of wondering if this woman could have been like her, Noah could make out a tiny figure padding through the maze of headstones beneath the steady snowfall. She rose from her spot, curiously following the tiny thing, only to find that it was a kitten, making its way towards the paved path that leads throughout the cemetery.  _ Where could you possibly be going?  _ Noah followed the kitten to the road, noticing it couldn’t be more than just a few months old. She was wondering if she should try to coax it to her, maybe take it home to her roommates and out of the cold. All of a sudden, the kitten stopped padding, and sat down on the snowy pavement. Noah stopped too, as not to frighten it. She bent down and cooed, but the kitten simply looked back at her, and then began pacing forward again.  _ What a strange little guy.. _ She followed further, only for the kitten to do the same thing again, almost as if it wanted her to follow it. This went on for a while, and having nothing better to do, Noah decided to see where the kitten was leading her. The kitten rounded a small corner about another large tree, and as Noah turned, she noticed that the kitten was gone.  _ I wonder where it ran off to!  _ She thought. She looked around, but did a double-take when she noticed the kitten’s footprints seemed off.  _ Wait a minute, they just stopped here?  _ It was as if the kitten rounded the corner and just vanished, white fur into snow. She turned around to try to find it, and upon turning back to where the tiny pawprints ended, she found herself face to face with a (rather handsome) man in a trench coat. She noticed right away there were no footprints leading up to where the man was standing. Startled, and despite her racing heart, Noah looked the man in the eye and said, “Are you lost?” That may sound like an odd reaction, but regularly walking around in one of the oldest cemeteries in the state made her a little too used to being confronted by strangers. “No, I am not lost.” He replied, in a matter-of-fact tone. Not really knowing what to say, Noah went with “Alright then.” She turned to walk away (quickly), but she heard him speak again, “You’re Noah Elaine Ford, born April 12th, 1985, daughter of Ava Cox and Jeremy Ford.” She froze in her tracks.  _ Well that’s definitely something.  _ She turned around slowly, a deadly look on her face, hiding her fear. “And you are?” she questioned. Without hesitating, the man in the trenchcoat replied “My name is Castiel.” He looked as if he was about to say more, but he hesitated. She suddenly became aware of how deep into the cemetery that kitten had led her. “Do I know you?” She asked him. His face remained serious, as he gravely responded, “I hope not. But I need you to come with me. You do not belong here, Noah.”  _ Okay, I’ve had enough of this,  _ she thought. “And why in the hell would I go anywhere with you?” She retorted. Her hands were tightly wound into fists at her sides, her heart beating rapidly. He began to pace towards her as he said “I’m sorry but I can’t explain now, we don’t have much time.” He lifted his arm towards her, two fingers outstretched. Knowing she couldn’t outrun him, she cocked her fist and hurled a punch right at his midsection, only to hear a sickening crunch and find her right hand in an impressive amount of pain. “Who the fu-” she started, but before she could finish his fingers were pressed against her forehead and she felt the ground below her fall away in a flash of blazing light. 

When she opened her eyes, she found herself in the queen bed of what appeared to be some cheap motel. Her whole body felt weirdly sore, and the knuckles of her right hand were an unpleasant mix of green and purple. She quickly rose from the bed, headed towards the table in the corner of the room where her overcoat and shoes were perched neatly. She reached for her phone only to find it dead. A light flutter from behind her made her whip around only to be face to face with the man in the trenchcoat again, this time, another man standing behind him. “Noah-” Castiel started, but was cut off by her shouting “WHERE THE HELL AM I?” The man behind him looked at her with a pretty goofy looking expression on his face, but Castiel, ever so serious, said “You’re in a Motel 6 in Yankton, South Dakota, in the United States,” he paused, “on the planet Earth.” She looked at them, dumbfounded. “WHY?!” The man behind Castiel spoke, “There’s a lot to explain here kiddo, so why don’t you sit down so we can unpack it?” She looked at him, noticing he was handsome, but a bit shorter than Castiel, and was dressed like a plumber from a terrible porno. “I’m sorry, who the hell are you?” She was trying to contain a mix of panic and anger, and was doing a terrible job at it. Castiel looked exasperated. “My name is Gabriel, and sorry for the lack of sugarcoating Dorothy, but you’re not in Kansas anymore, so if I were you, I’d sit down for this next part.”

“So.. to make a long story short, you two religious nuts are trying to tell me that you’re angels, and that you plucked me out  _ my world,  _ which is apparently some alternate reality you put me in to protect me because-surprise!-god is real, and the apocalypse is actually happening and apparently I’m somehow a part of it?” She said, rather sarcastically. “Yes.” Castiel replied shortly. She looked at the two men sitting across from her, and decided to make a run for the door. Upon bursting through it, however, she found herself stumbling back into the same motel room, facing the two men who were still seated.  _ What the hell is going on???  _ She thought. Gabriel sighed, “I told you Cas, talking just wasn’t gonna cut it, this one’s feisty. She gets it from her daddy.” He winked.  _ Gross.  _ Gabriel stood from his seat and she heard the door slam behind her. Stammering out protests, and backing away until she was flush against the door, Gabriel approached until his fingers were against her forehead. This time, she saw it all.

_ Gabriel stood protectively in front of Ava, who was holding a newborn Noah in her arms. “You lay one finger on my little girl and you’ll all be ash.” He said through gritted teeth. He was holding a strange silver blade in his hand, pointing it towards the two women in front of him. “Gabriel, you know the rules. You cannot bring a nephilim into this world, the danger is too great. It’s an abomination that we just cannot allow.” One of them said coldly. The other spoke, “Move out of the way and let us perform God’s Will.” Gabriel looked back at his child, then turning to face the women yelled “YOU WILL NOT TOUCH HER!” He lunged towards the two women, starting a fight that can only be described as biblical while Ava sobbed in fear, clutching her fretting infant in her arms. As Gabriel tussled with one of the women, the other made her way towards Ava, ripping the infant from the trembling woman's grasp and, holding her blade tightly, made to strike the child with it. A blaze of blue light accompanied by a scream came from across the room as Gabriel turned to look at his child “NO!” He screamed, but the woman had already begun to bring the blade down upon the child, only to be frozen in her swing, crying out in pain. She dropped the knife, and stumbled. She looked at the child and said, mortified, “Have mercy..” Ava rose from the floor and tore her baby away from the woman, as Gabriel lunged at her. “Wait, Wait, Gabriel, STOP!” With his blade against her throat, he seethed, “Why should I?” She responded “Because that child bears the soul of Adam.” The room fell silent. _

_ Now surrounded by people--no--angels, Gabriel stood protectively by Ava as she soothed the infant Noah. “What are we to do?” one of the angels spoke. Gabriel looked pensive, and then stated with firmness “She will be moved, for her own protection.” A chorus of questions arose within the room, “Moved where?” “But what about the grace?” “We can’t tarnish the first soul!” Gabriel raised a hand, and looked at one of the angels who had been standing silently. “Rafael?” he said. The angel Rafael spoke loudly, “She will be moved to another world where her grace cannot exist. Once she dies, the next incarnation of Adam will be brought back to our universe where they belong.” The room fell silent, solemn almost, before an angel questioned, "Must we bring the soul back? Imagine, a world without Lucifer's abominations to torture her, the soul of Adam would finally be freed." One angel spoke up, "That would be great, Semandriel, but we cannot leave her there. She must be brought back just before death to ensure the soul will continue to live." This time, there was a long, sorrowful pause before another angel spoke.“Is this to be the will of god? The soul of Adam is His most precious, Rafael.” Rafael looked at her and said, “Yes, it is the will of god that the First Soul be reincarnated for all eternity. We can't allow her the immortality of a nephilim.” “But why can’t we just kill the infant and let the soul reincarnate again?” There was a pause, Rafael and Gabriel glared at the angel as though she had uttered a blasphemy. “I don’t make these decisions, Dumah. You know this.” Rafael raised his hands, and a large column of light appeared in the room, sizzling with energy. He took Ava’s hand, and motioned for semandriel to follow as he led them through the light, which Noah realized later, was a portal. _

_ Rafael is watching over a family, Noah’s family, as they settle into a what she remembers painfully as her childhood home. Semandriel is next to Rafael again, asking “Ava, will she remember?” Rafael looked forlorn. “Nothing of Gabriel. I put new memories in her head of a husband, Jeremy Price. They will raise the child here.” He paused, looking at Semandriel. “Come with me now, it is time to leave them.” said Rafael. Semandriel asked, with concern, “Will Adam’s soul be safe here? Will the nephilim really be without her grace?” Rafael looked pensive, “We can only hope so.” And with a crack of electricity, they returned through the portal to find Gabriel weeping. Rafael looked down at his brother, without an ounce of empathy. “You are lucky, Gabriel.” With a flutter of wings, the two remaining angels were gone, leaving Gabriel on his knees, alone.  _

Noah opened her eyes to find them locked with Gabriel’s, his hand falling from her forehead. She didn’t know what to think, paralyzed with utter shock and confusion. “So, you’re… my real father?” She said, almost in a whisper. Gabriel looked at her, a semblance of love crossing his face at the realization of how beautiful his daughter had grown up to be. “Yes.” A long silence fell across the room, but was broken when Castiel shouted “What did you show her?” Gabriel whipped around, “I showed her everything.” Castiel looked enraged. “You know that was a bad idea.” “Well how else are we supposed to find out what she can do?” “Brother, the more she knows the more danger she is in. The other angels will already be coming for her, they’ve sensed her power entering the world.” Noah stood, frozen. _Coming for me? What does that mean_ _? _ Gabriel said, “Then we have to ward her, like you did with the Winchesters.” He grabbed at Noah, making her seize into a fit of panic, kicking at him as he wrestled her onto one of the beds. He pinned her arms and said “I’m sorry, but we have to do this. It's for your own good, kid.” Castiel put his hands over her abdomen as she pleaded with them to let her go, and shot her an apologetic look just before a blaze of searing pain took over her ribcage. From there, everything went black again.

Gabriel pulled a blanket over her, hoping she would soon understand. Castiel said to him, “You know, her grace may not replenish in time to stop Lucifer.” Gabriel looked angry, “You think I don’t know that little brother? And you think I don’t know that we’ll have to wipe her damned memory every five minutes? Just stop to think for a second, Cas, this isn’t easy for me. They ripped my little girl _and_ Ava from me, and  _ this  _ is how I have to see her again, confused and in pain because of me. All because we’re trying to use her as a tool in an apocalypse she was never meant to witness, all of which she might not even be able to do. And after all of that, she won’t even know who I am.” Castiel replied “That’s of no importance, Gabriel, that’s not why we brought her back into this world.” Gabriel looked frustrated, “I know, it’s because our favorite constipated Ken Doll is too stuck-up to play his part.” Castiel remained silent, for a moment, then said “I am going to go check on Sam and Dean. They’re still a bit angry about the television stunt” Gabriel mocked him saying “Sam and Dean,” and said “Yeah, whatever, have fun with your boyfriends. I’ll call for you when she wakes up.” Castiel looked at him for a moment, analyzing the pain in his brother’s face, something he had never seen before. “She’s the reason you left Heaven” He said, as if it were a question. Gabriel said nothing, and Castiel disappeared with a swoosh of air. The archangel remained, sitting beside his daughter’s sleeping body. He cupped her injured hand with his, removing it to reveal the bruises had faded away. Holding it for a moment, closing his eyes, Gabriel whispered, “I’m so sorry…”


	2. Messiah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a few failed attempts to measure the power of Noah, Gabriel and Castiel realize that at the present moment, she has no grace. Castiel wipes the memories of the visions Gabriel gave to her, and instead explains to her that she was removed from this world for her protection and was brought back as a rescue mission, otherwise her existence in the other reality and absence from this one would too greatly alter the timelines. She knows nothing of being the reincarnation of Adam, or of being a nephilim. He decides to take her to the Winchesters for protection.

It had been a few days since Noah had been plucked from the cemetery near her home and taken trans-reality to the Motel 6 where she was being kept by Gabriel and Castiel. Those days were filled with questions, tears, and countless failed attempts at ridiculous tasks the angels asked of her. They had asked her to try to teleport, to heal herself after they would wound her, they tried to speak to her telepathically, and asked her to move objects with her mind, none of which she could do of course. She felt like she was going crazy, but Gabriel thought she was adjusting well enough, considering she at least believed them (after hours of Q&A, nonetheless). They didn’t really give her time to sleep, and seemed to have forgotten that humans need to eat, but they at least gave her new clothes, which she appreciated considering she was still in her suit when she arrived. They even gave her a computer, her use of which they supervised, so that she could see on her own that she  _ really was  _ in another reality. “So I really don’t exist here..” she said, among other realizations of how different *and seemingly, significantly better) this world really was. For the last day, it had just been her and Gabriel, as Castiel was once again off with whoever Sam and Dean Winchester were. Noah figured they must have been major players in this apocalypse scenario as well, considering how often the angels talked about them. She wondered idly if she would get to meet them, as Castiel appeared in the room once more. 

“Has there been any success with her grace?” he asked. “No. I don’t think I have the powers, or grace, or whatever it is you guys are looking for in me. I'm starting to think you might have the wrong girl. I’m sorry.” Noah responded, before Gabriel could. “I was afraid of that.” Castiel said. Him and Gabriel exchanged looks, as if they were having a silent conversation. Gabriel became angry, and rose from his seat. “No, I will not send her back to that hell of a world they forced me to trap her in. She belongs here, Castiel, they never should have taken her away from me. Her grace will come back. Even if we wanted to, I don't have the juice to open a rift like that and neither do you.” Castiel said gently, “It might, but it could take a lifetime. I fear this may have been a waste of our time, and frankly, a crime we cannot even imagine the punishment for.” This wasn’t exactly making Noah feel great about herself, but she figured the expectations were a little too high from the jump. After all, she was just a girl, barely even into adulthood at 24. She lived in a run-down house in New York with two of her college friends that went to the same grad school. She drove a beat-up old Ford that barely ran and had back problems. _Who do they honestly think I am? All I have to my name is a traumatic childhood and a ''give 'em hell' attitude. Well, a triple degree too, but I don't like to brag._ “What do you want me to do?” She asked. She wasn't thrilled at the idea of serving a God who allowed her life to play out the way it had, in fact, she resented him now that she had an inkling of faith he even existed. However, there didn't seem to be a chance of going back to her old life, not that she even wanted to, and she was willing to jump to save _any_ world from some horrible apocalypse. The two angels exchanged looks once more, this time for a bit longer. Gabriel looked mournfully at his daughter for a brief second, then said “Well, adios chica. It was nice catching up with you,” and with a faint look of sadness on his face, he disappeared. Castiel sat slowly across from Noah, and simply said, “I’m going to take you to some friends. They’ll keep you safe. Oh, and uh.. I'm sorry about this.” He placed his fingers against her temple once more, and in the blink of an eye, she forgot about the tests, and forgot about Gabriel and the visions he gave to her. She remembered bits and pieces, the information they had given her about being in a different reality, about the apocalypse and the existence of angels and demons, but nothing of her real father, or the fact that she was supposedly a nephilim. Once he removed his fingers, she looked at him confused once more. “What was that, Castiel? Why am I here?” she asked, calmly this time. Castiel sighed, and started on the lie of why he had brought her here. “You have been living in a reality alternate to the one you were born in. Where we brought you back from was not your home. You were taken there by angels when you were just an infant for protection from the monsters in this world, as in yours, they don’t exist. We’ve brought you back because you have an important role to play in the apocalypse. Remember?” She shook her head, understanding completely.. This was because the angel had already planted this story in her head, making the pill much easier to swallow. “I have to go now.” he said to her. “But where will I go?” Castiel took her hand gently. “I’m going to introduce you to some friends of mine, Sam and Dean Winchester. I trust that they will keep you safe.” “Safe from what? How am I supposed to help with the apocalypse? I’m just a grad student!" She said, fretfully. Castiel said to her, “Don’t worry about that for right now. You are special, Noah. When the time comes, I trust you’ll know your purpose.” After that last word, Noah once again felt the floor fall away beneath her as the world turned into nothing but a bright, white light. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins! (: I'm thinking of changing the POV to first person (Noah) however, so maybe I can play around with the POV of other characters in the future. Thoughts?


	3. Tribulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noah wakes in a strange house, with three strange men. Time for some interesting introductions..

Once the ground returned to Noah’s feet, she opened her eyes to see that she was in the room of an old house, surrounded by dusty bookshelves, standing in front of a small desk cluttered in books written in another language. Once the world stopped spinning, she realized there were three other men in the room, and Castiel was still gripping her hand. She was still dizzy, and too tired and confused to question the angel anymore, so she just stood silently waiting for her eyes to stop rolling around in her head. _It's been a long time since I've been this hungry._ She thought, silently. Castiel looked at the older man sitting at the desk and said “Hello.” There was an awkward pause before the man said a disgruntled, yet surprised "Cas” back to him. He released his grip on Noah’s hand and turned to one of the other men who was standing as though he’d just jumped out of his skin. “Dean.” he said curtly, to which the man-Dean, Noah presumed- responded by saying “God damn it Cas, can’t you just call or something before just popping in on us like that?” 

“I’m sorry, I.. didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Well you did! We’re humans, Cas, we have hearts, and you just about made mine stop.”

“Sorry…” Castiel paused. The other man, who was now standing behind Castiel, cleared his throat loudly. “So, uh.. Are you gonna .. tell us who that is, or why you’re here? Or are you just gonna stand there?” Castiel looked flustered for a moment, then said “Yes, right. Sam, Dean, Bobby, this is Noah.” Noah stood rather awkwardly, looking at the men in the room. Dean looked pretty pissed, and the older man was rubbing his temples. The tall man was just sort of standing there looking at her, but all Noah could think about was just getting this little get-to-know-me game over with so she could find somewhere to sleep. A moment passed before Dean finally said angrily, throwing his hands up, “And?!” Castiel responded quickly, “Oh, right, I need you to keep her safe for me.” 

Dean looked at Castiel as if he had three heads and said, “Keep her safe? From what? Who even is this little girl and why is she our problem?” The tall man looked at Dean and said “dude..” as if to tell him to calm down. “What?” he retorted. “He just gets to zap his feathery ass in here and tells us we’re on babysitting duty?” Noah was a bit offended, but too tired, too hungry, and way too focused on staying upright to care. Something about being "zapped" took everything out of her.

“Dean, she’s not a child. She's actually 24, though I could see why you think she’s a child, considering she is quite tiny for a huma-” Castiel was interrupted by the tall man, “Not the point, Cas, who is she?” “Right.” He answered, “I retrieved Noah from another reality. She was brought there as a child by angels, but she doesn’t belong there. She was born in this reality, and I believe that she has a part to play in the apocalypse. I need you to keep her safe for now.” Dean took a step towards Castiel and raised his hands “Woah, woah, woah, wait, another reality? What the hell does that mean?” The tall man interjected, “I think he means alternate reality like the one Gabriel put us in, the TV shows.” Castiel turned, “Yes, exactly like that, only in her world there was no such thing as the supernatural. There was no apocalypse, no angels, demons, monsters, any of it.” Dean crossed his arms and scoffed, “Well that sounds awesome, why the hell did you bring her here?” Castiel sighed, and Noah became increasingly alarmed at how quickly the room was starting to spin around her again. “Because she belongs in this world, Dean, she was born here.” The older man sitting at the desk looked up at the angel and said “Well what the hell do you want us to do with her? Does she even speak?” Castiel rolled his eyes, “Yes, she speaks. And I already told you, I need you to keep her safe.” The man began to say “Safe from what?” but before he could finish the question Castiel had disappeared. Noah started to feel extremely nauseous, and didn’t even notice that the older man had said something to her. She sort of turned off her ears after all of the huffing from Dean and the other man over Castiel’s disappearance. “I- I’m sorry, did you- ask me something?” Noah said to the older man. “Yeah, I asked you who the hell are you?” Noah started to respond, “Oh, I’m, um..” but before she could even get her own name out her vision started to go black as her knees gave in, "going to pass out now," she said faintly as she fell to the ground from exhaustion. She was only barely aware of the shouting, as well as the tall man lifting her from the ground. Her lights went out before she could see where he was carrying her. 

**//The next sections will be written from Noah’s first-person POV.**

I woke up in a strange bed, in strange clothes, in a strange universe. I rubbed my eyes and sat up, realizing from my frizzy hair and how thirsty I felt that I must have slept for a long time. I vaguely remembered meeting three men with Castiel after he brought me here, but I didn’t remember anything else, just that one of them seemed angry at me. Groggy and still confused, I climbed out of the bed to find that I wasn’t wearing any shoes, just the leggings and tee shirt that the angel gave to me at the motel. I looked on the bedside table and found my socks and glasses, which I put back on, and my suit and overcoat from the night in the cemetery folded neatly. I walked carefully out of the room and into the hallway, where I found the door to a bathroom. Thank god, cause I really had to pee.. I used the bathroom and found a spare toothbrush under the sink... _hopefully they don’t mind._ I looked at the mess that had been made of my hair after the last few days, and decided to just wet it for now, hoping the curls would even out a bit. _I'll shower later, after I get myself something to tie my hair up with,_ I thought to myself. After washing off the remaining makeup the angels wouldn't give me time to remove, I took a deep breath, looking at myself in the mirror. _What is happening to me?_ Is the only thought I could muster before I heard a gentle knock on the door. “You okay Noah?” I recognized the voice, but couldn’t remember which man it belonged to. I cracked open the door and slipped out to come face to face with a giant man with long hair, and some serious scruff. “Uh, yeah, I’m.. okay” I replied, rather weakly. _What the hell is wrong with me? Have I suddenly become shy or something? Well.. I'd be lying if I said he wasn't handsome,_ I thought. He looked me up and down, “Okay, just checking. You uh, slept for a pretty long time there.” “How long was I out?” I asked. “Just about 16 hours,” he responded. “Oh.. wow.” I said, “I’m sorry.” He cocked his head, “Why are you sorry?” I sort of stammered, “Well, I mean, that angel-Castiel-sort of just dropped me here and then I just..kinda, passed out on your floor, and then slept in your house for 16 hours, and you guys don’t even know who I am. I mean, I don’t even know who you are..." I trailed off. The tall man smiled softly, “Relax, you have nothing to apologize for. Something tells me this isn’t your fault. My name is Sam, by the way.” I tried to smile, “Well it’s nice to meet you Sam, I’m Noah.” He smiled back, “So I heard.” I reached up to adjust my glasses, but something must have caught Sam’s eye, because he looked down at my arm and took my wrist in his (massive) hand. “What happened here?” He asked with a bit of concern. I looked down at my forearm to see a rather large cut across it. What the hell is that from? “I uh.. I have no idea, actually. I didn’t even notice it until just now.” “Huh,” Sam said, “Interesting. It looks like it’s healing at least.” “Yeah..” I said weakly, gently taking my arm back. Geez did my head hurt.. “So you really don’t know why Cas brought you here?” I looked up at him, “No. I don’t even know why he brought me to this world. He said I have a role in the apocalypse, but he wouldn’t tell me anything else. Apparently I was supposed to be in this reality, but something happened when I was a baby I guess.” Sam stayed silent for a moment, analyzing me. If I didn’t feel the equivalent of the worst hangover ever, I’d probably be pretty self conscious right about now. Sam-Winchester, I presume-seemed nice though, which I definitely appreciated after the angry man from last night.. _What was his name?_ I decided to ask, “So the other two men here, who are they?” “Well the older one is Bobby Singer, this is his house. And the other one-” “the angry one?” I interjected, causing Sam to laugh, “-yes, the angry one. That’s my older brother, Dean.” “Right.” I responded. “So.. um.. Where are we?” Sam looked a bit surprised at the question. “We’re in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. Where were you from in your world?” He asked. “I was going to school in upstate New York..” I trailed off. _South Dakota? Why the hell did Castiel drop me here? Who are these people? Wait.. What time is it?_ “Uh, Sam? What time is it?” He looked down at his watch and said “It's 5:27 p.m. Bobby and Dean are probably downstairs. Are you hungry?” At that question, I realized I was seriously starving. I nodded my head yes, and he motioned for me to follow him downstairs. Looking around the house, I realized I was in way over my head. It looked like they were doing all sorts of weird satanist stuff in here.. _Is that Latin? Okay, I need a drink.. Or 10._ As we came through the den into the kitchen, I saw Dean and Bobby sitting at a table together looking at a book and talking about some religious something I couldn't even begin to comprehend. Sam cleared his throat and the two men looked up at me. “She’s awake,” he said. I tried to smile politely but everything that was happening just felt weird. I mean, some angel pulls me out of my life and just drops me in some alternate timeline and I’m just supposed to get cozy with three random dudes? Jesus H. Christ. Dean looks up from the book at me, and eyes me up and down only to say “Mornin’ sunshine.” Bobby smiled kindly at me and said “I take it you’re feeling better then?” Suddenly it hit me how embarrassing it actually was that I just passed out on the floor the way I did.. “Oh, uh yeah..” I laughed a bit, “much better.” He sat up, “Good, then you can get on to tellin’ us what the hell you’re doing here. Sit.” He pulled out the third chair. I sat down, feeling like a burden with every movement. _Aren’t angels supposed to be.. Like.. good? And nice? Why would an angel drop me on these guys like this without warning?_ Dean was still staring at me, and I couldn’t tell if it was because he wanted to punch me or undress me. Either way, I felt awkward as all hell. Sam was still standing behind me with a hand on the back of my chair when he said “I’m gonna go make a run for some dinner. I’ll be back in 20.” 

“PIE.” Dean demanded. _Sheesh!_ I thought.

“Yeah, whatever,” Sam said, as he shut the door behind him.

I wasn’t a fan of the only friendly one in the house leaving me alone with two more strangers, but I figured I’d live. Dean got up and opened the fridge, pulling out two bottles of beer. He paused and looked at me, “You drink, sunshine?” 

“Uh.. yeah.. You got anything stronger by chance?” I asked, a little boldly.

Dean threw a half smile my way before digging in the fridge a bit more and pulling out a bottle of whiskey. I let out a smallsigh of relief as Dean said, “You like whiskey?” I nodded enthusiastically, and he smiled a bit more, “Well that’s good at least.” He poured two glasses and set one down in front of me, which I immediately took a swig of. It wasn’t good, but it wasn’t bad either. _Medicine,_ I thought to myself. Bobby opened his beer and said, “So, Noah, right?” I nodded, “and you’re Bobby, and you’re Dean?” They both nodded, and I took another gulp of my drink. “So start talkin’ tiny. Who the hell are you?” I looked at him and started to explain, “Honestly, Dean.. I’m just a grad student from New York. Well, I grew up in Ohio.. Anyway, I don’t know why I’m here. I was just taking a walk in a cemetery, and then suddenly the angel, Castiel, showed up and told me I had to come with him. I punched him, and it uh.. Really hurt.. Then he just touched my head and suddenly I was in a motel with him.” Bobby piped up, “Did he tell you why you had to go with him?” I nodded my head no, and took another sip. “I was there for a few days, but I think he did something to my head, because everything is super foggy. All I really remember from the motel is him giving me a change of clothes, and then telling me…” I trailed off, trying to remember. “Well come on, sweetheart, I’m trying to figure out what the hell we're supposed to be protecting you from.” Dean said. I shot him a look. “All he told me was that I had a part to play in this apocalypse. Apparently I was born here, in this universe.. Reality.. Whatever.. And that for some reason the angels put me in the other one, where there are no monsters, or angels or demons. He said they did it for my protection, but that it was time for me to come back. Something about the timeline, the apocalypse. I really have no idea what I’m supposed to do.” Bobby looked as if he was thinking hard about what I had said, but Dean wanted answers. “So what's so special about you then, huh?” “Um.. not really. I mean, I'd say more stuff tends to happen to me than to other people, but nothing close to what you guys must be used to dealing with. I'm sorry, I just really don't know. I wish I could tell you different." Dean put his face in his hand, frustrated. He looked at Bobby, “What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Do you even know what monsters are?” He was looking at me again, and I was kind of getting tired of this attitude from him. How is any of this my fault? “No, how would I? They don’t exist where I’m from. I can guess you mean stuff like vampires and werewolves and what not, but those are only urban legends in my world.” Dean looked me in the eyes, and said, very seriously, “They’re all real here. Vampires, werewolves, djinn, shifters, gods, demons, angels, you name it. And they sure as hell ain't like they are in Twilight.” “Except Bigfoot, that’s actually an urban legend.” Bobby said. I processed this for a minute. “So you hunt them then? That’s your job?” Bobby and Dean both chuckled, “Yeah,” Bobby said, “ 'cept nobody pays us for it.” 

“Does everyone know?” I asked, “That monsters are real?”

“No.” Dean answered. “Most people don’t, I think if everyone knew the world would be chaos. The people who know about them, who kill them, we’re called hunters. Me, Sam, Bobby, that’s what we do.” 

“Okay, I think I understand.” I said. “So you three have something to do with the apocalypse then?”

Dean and Bobby exchanged looks. “Yep!” Bobby said with a mock-cheerfulness. “The Jolly Green Giant started it himself.” He said as he raised his beer to his lips. “Hey,” Dean scolded. Something about Dean was very.. Intense. I could tell right away he was not one to be taken lightly, and I sure as hell didn't want to piss him off anymore than he already was. I had an inkling he wouldn't hesitate to do some damage if I made him angry enough. To be honest, I was a little scared of him, which is a first for me. _I've never been scared of a man in my life, not since Dad beat the fear out of me. So what is it about Dean Winchester that has me so tense? What has he done?_

I downed the rest of my glass of whiskey and set it on the table. “I guess you have a lot to catch me up on then," I said, trying to hide the shakiness in my voice. Dean eyed me once more. “Yeah, I guess we do.” "So what is it we're supposed to be protecting you from, exactly?" Bobby asked me directly. I shifted my gaze from Dean's green eyes to Bobby's blue ones. They looked like they've seen hell, but I can sense a lot of love in them, which I found comforting. "I'm sorry... I just don't know." Dean rolled his eyes, "But um.. my best guess would be Angels. I don't really know why, but I think Castiel wanted you to protect me from other Angels." I finished. "Any chance you know why?" Dean asked. "No, not any more than you do. I'm not sure how many times I can say I'm sorry." I folded my hands in my lap as Dean finished off his glass of whiskey and stood up. “I need another drink.” I looked up at him, “I second that.” 

The three of us sat in silence for a little while as Dean and Bobby continued reading whatever it was they had been looking at before I woke up. Sam finally returned with some takeout. He set the bags on the table as Bobby and Dean cleared their books and said “I hope you like Chinese.” Dean looked at Sam angrily, "Pie?" he demanded. "Sorry, must've forgot," Sam replied with a teasing shrug as he turned around, missing the death glare from his older brother. "This for me?” I picked up a container of chicken fried rice. “Uh, yeah, I didn’t know what you’d like.” “This is great, thanks Sam.” I said. _Oh shit, how am I gonna pay them for this?_ I froze for a moment, and turned to look back at Sam, who was getting two beers from the fridge. He set one down in front of me and pulled up the chair next to me. Dean had a smirk on his face, I assume because he thinks they’re getting me drunk, but I ignored him. “Sam, I’m sorry, but I don’t know how to pay you for this. When the angel-Castiel-brought me here, I didn’t have my wallet or anything on me.” At that, Sam, Dean, and Bobby all burst out into laughter. Dean swallowed a mouthful of food and said, “Ahh, sweetheart, you have a lot to learn about hunters.” I laughed nervously, “I guess I do.” Then, after a pause, I looked at the three of them and said “Thank you guys.” “For what?” they all said at the same time. “Well, for letting me sleep here, for one. And for getting me Chinese food, and letting me drink your whiskey. I don’t know, I just feel like you guys are weirdly welcoming to some stranger Castiel just dumped on you.” Dean swallowed again. “If Cas says we need to keep you safe, then that’s exactly what we’ll do. He’s our friend.” I nodded in understanding. “Still, thank you.” Sam put his (seriously, massive) hand on my shoulder. “Don’t sweat it. We’re just as clueless as you are when it comes to Cas.” I laughed. I couldn't help the smile on my face as I opened up the container holding one of my favorite comfort meals. I thought, _Hey, if you’re gonna get dumped in a house full of strangers by some angel claiming you have a hand in the apocalypse… at least be grateful that those strangers are nice to you, right?_


	4. Fining

I had been at Bobby’s house with him and the Winchesters for nearly a week now. After that first night, Bobby had asked me for a shopping list so he and Sam could pick up some things for me since everything I had ever owned existed in a different reality. Plus, it was getting a little silly seeing me alternate between my only set of clothes that Castiel had given me and borrowed tee shirts and jeans from the boys that were comically large on me. Sam had carefully suggested at one point that I look through Bobby’s wife’s old clothes, but the look on Bobby’s face suggested that was a sore spot, and I really didn’t want to go asking questions. It was definitely awkward for me not to be able to just go myself, but Dean insisted that I not leave Bobby’s property for my own safety. From what, or why I needed protecting, we still were pretty much clueless aside from the inkling that it might be angels looking for me. The only reason I had to leave was just the one time deal of getting an anti-possession tattoo, under orders from all three of the men. They were surprised when I didn’t resist the suggestion, and were even more surprised to learn that I already had some tattoos of my own. “I just didn’t take you for the type to get inked, you know?” Dean said, as I showed him the few I had scattered around. A ram’s head on my upper arm, some dates on my ribcage (in memoriam of some family members), the Ford Mustang logo, and a few other political tattoos. I was actually shocked myself to find that Sam and Dean only had the one tattoo each, because they definitely seemed like the type to get inked. Or at least Dean did, anyway. I had the symbol put on the back of my right shoulder, and when I came back to the house that day with Dean I found that Bobby and Sam had returned from their little shopping trip for me. 

“That was quick!” Dean quipped as the two men came through the door, a few shopping bags placed in Bobby's lap.

“Well, she was specific. Actually made it pretty easy for us.” Sam responded, taking the bags from Bobby and setting them on the floor.

“Thank you, so much! I couldn’t have even asked for you to be so kind to me, I appreciate everything, really.” I stood up, talking to the men. Honestly, I felt awkward, and guilty for some reason. I felt terrible that they had to go to such lengths for me when I didn’t feel like it should be their responsibility. Plus, I could tell right away that shopping wasn’t exactly their thing.. So I really did appreciate them going out of their way to make sure I had what I needed.

“It’s no problem, Noah. But that’s the last time I ever go into the lady-care aisle, I swear the cashier looked like he was going to call the cops on me and Sam.” Bobby retorted. Dean chuckled. “Yeah, the last thing you need is everybody thinkin’ you’re a drunk _and_ a creep.” Bobby shot him a glare as he pulled a beer out of the fridge for himself. _I guess any time is miller time for these guys, huh._ I thought to myself, considering it was 2 p.m. 

“Why don’t you go get everything settled, Noah?” Sam suggested. I shook my head, awkwardly reaching for the bags he and Bobby brought in. “Here, I’ll help you,” He said as he started over, but was interrupted by a text message. He fished his phone out of his pocket, and suddenly his demeanor changed. “Is.. everything okay, Sam?” I said, concerned.

“It’s an address, from Chuck.” He looked towards Dean, who said “And?”

“Apparently it's an emergency, uh ‘life or death situation.’ We gotta go, Dean.” He said as he quickly headed to grab their go-bags. “On it.” Dean said. They exchanged a few quick words with Bobby, and were headed towards the door in a flash. Just before closing it behind him, Dean turned to Bobby and said, “Keep her here, let us know if anything goes wrong. You,” He said, looking directly at me, pointing, “be good.” I nodded, and the door was shut behind him, leaving Bobby and I alone. “Well then,” he said after a moment, “Go ahead and get your stuff settled then, let me know if we forgot anything.” I nodded, grabbing the bags off the floor once more. “Okay. Thank you Bobby. Seriously.” He flashed me a smile as I headed up the stairs. Once I closed the door behind me to the spare bedroom I had been staying in, I set the bags on the bed and went through them.  _ Soap, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, face wash, pads (thank goodness they got the right kind!), chapstick, lotion, hair creme and gel..  _ I felt a little silly asking Bobby to pick me up hair care products, but alternate reality or not, a curly top is a curly top. Plus, since they told me all of their money comes from credit card scamming, I didn’t exactly feel guilty for it.  _ Hair ties, pins (thank gods) and hairspray.. Interesting, I didn’t put that on the list. Come to think of it, I didn’t put perfume either. This had to be Sam.. that was so sweet of him!  _ I thought to myself, going through everything. I started to laugh when I pulled out a few makeup items that Sam and Bobby must have picked out themselves. I didn’t ask for any makeup, but I guess since it had come up in conversation that I used to do it as a little side hustle in my first few years of college, they must have thought I would appreciate some. They had picked out a small Elf brand eyeshadow palette with lots of colors, a bronzing duo with an interesting shade of yellow, some brand of mascara i’ve never even heard of, and a dark red lipstick.  _ Men,  _ was all I could think as I chuckled to myself, not being able to help the smile on my face at the thought of Bobby trying to pick out makeup.  _ This is so nice of them..  _ I was starting to think that maybe the men were beginning to think of me as a friend more than a burden, which was a big comfort to me. The larger bag contained a pack of mens small boxer shorts, which I wrote specifically to make sure the boys didn’t have to buy women’s underwear for me. I think they were grateful for that, and I wasn’t upset considering I usually wore those anyway. There were a few pairs of jeans in my size, some long socks, plain black and white tee shirts, a pair of sneakers, and two small sports bras. Oh, and of course, they had picked out some flannel shirts in a men’s medium. I wondered if that was because of how much I had joked about those two looking like lumberjacks this past week.. This was more than I had asked for, but again, I was grateful. They even bought a small black belt, a denim jacket two sizes too big, and a gray hooded sweatshirt from the thrift store for me. The last bag I noticed had two small journals and a pack of pens, and a box for a cellphone. I wondered what the journals were for, as I opened the box with the TracFone and started to look through it when I realized it had already been set up. There was a text from a number already saved as Sam that said, “Noah, I figured this would come in handy, -Sam.” I looked through the contacts to see that all of Sam and Dean’s numbers were saved, as well as Bobby’s and the lines to all of his kitchen phones. There was a contact saved that just read “Cas?” as well as some people I didn’t know:  _ Pamela Barnes, Rufus Turner, Ellen Harvelle, Jo Harvelle, and Ash.  _ I hovered over Sam’s text, wanting to reply with a grateful thank you, but remembering how they left in a hurry, I didn’t want to chance interrupting something serious, so I decided to thank him when he and Dean returned. I changed out of the clothes I was wearing (a pair of jeans and a tee shirt that belonged to Dean, sleeves and pant legs rolled up ridiculously far, and my underwire bra that I had from the trial) and decided to go for a shower. After I was done and had the new products in my hair for a test run, I put on the new jeans, socks, boxers, sports bra, tee shirt, and flannel that Sam and Bobby had gotten for me. I felt much more comfortable, and decided to try on the denim jacket and sneakers before putting Dean’s clothes through the washer. Surprisingly, the jacket looked good despite being massive, and the shoes were comfortable. Looking at myself in the little mirror, I took the jacket off and put on one of the flannels and smiled, pulling the tags off and tossing them in the trash.  _ Well now I definitely look like a Winchester.  _ I laughed inwardly, pulling the shark tooth necklace I never took off out from under my collar. I was glad I decided to tuck it under my dress shirt that night instead of taking it off. It was just a simple little thing, brown twine with a shark tooth I found on the shore of a massive river I lived by when I was a kid, attached with an old hook from a Christmas ornament I bent with pliers. I had it for years, and never took it off since it was tied in a knot at the back of my neck. It reminded me of the river, one of the only places I ever really thought of as home.

I went back downstairs to find Bobby looking through his kitchen, presumably to find something to eat. I had the journals, pens, and the cellphone in my hand as I approached. He turned his head, giving me a look up and down before smiling and saying “Well that’s definitely a change for the better, kid.” I beamed at him, nodding my head and saying, “Seriously, thanks so much. Everything fits great.” I sat down at the little table behind him as he continued to look and said, “Also, thanks for getting me a cellphone, that was really nice of you guys. Oh, and the makeup was a nice touch too. I can’t wait to try it out.” He turned around and resigned from his search, deciding to move across from me at the table instead. He was smiling again, and said “The phone was Sam’s idea. And I thought you’d appreciate something for your face, since you were sayin’ how much you liked to do it before.” I giggled a bit, before saying, “The only thing I was wondering, was what these journals are for.”

“To take notes.” He said seriously. “I figured while those two idjits are off doin’ whatever it is they do, you and I could do a little hunter’s-ed crash course while we’re stuck here.” 

“Oh, wow. Yeah, I’d love that Bobby, thanks.” He smiled, looking down at the piles of books and notes in front of him. “Am I going to have to learn Latin?” I asked, somewhat jokingly, but he responded seriously “Yep. For your own good.” There was a pause for a minute, in which I heard his stomach rumble softly.  _ He’s been doing research all day for this whole apocalypse fiasco, trying to find a way to stop it. Has he eaten anything?  _ I thought to myself, before realizing that I actually hadn’t eaten anything either. “You hungry Bobby? Cause if you want, I’m not a bad cook, I could look around and see if there’s something I can throw together?” He looked up at me and said, “Oh, you don’t have to do that Noah, I can just go pick somethin’ up.” He made for his keys and I put my hand over his, stopping him, and said, “You boys eat way too much takeout. If you’re gonna let me stay, the least I could do is handle dinner, Bobby.” It was true that I wanted to cook instead of more takeout, considering that was the only thing we’ve eaten in the last week, but I also didn’t want to admit that I was a little scared of being left alone. After all, they said this place is “warded” but I have no idea what that means, let alone what’s supposed to be after me, and no idea why. He smiled, before taking his hand from his keys and said, “Knock yourself out.” I took that as my cue, and headed towards the cabinets, asking him a few questions about where things were kept, before finding a box of spaghetti noodles and some old looking canned spaghetti sauce.  _ He must not get home cooked meals very often..  _ I thought sadly. I started to smile, thinking of my roommates and friends from school and how they always told me I acted like their mom because of the way I insisted on cooking dinner almost every night. I remembered the time they asked me casually, sitting around the dinner table in our rented house why I always made them sit and eat like a family when we were all 21 and living on our own. I broke down crying that night, and told them how much I loved them, and that they were the first real family I had ever felt close to. After that, neither of my two roommates ever skipped the “family dinner time” again, and it meant the world to me. It was something I think they knew I missed out on as a kid, and they were helping me make up for it. I felt my eyes water, thinking about Nicole and Evelyn, Sierra, Marsha, and even Rodney. I knew they were probably losing their minds trying to find me, and it hurt to know that there was no way to let them know I was okay. To them, I just disappeared.  _ I can’t think about this right now,  _ I told myself sternly as I sorted through the dusty spice containers in Bobby’s kitchen cabinets.

Many handfuls of old and probably expired spices later, I finally set down a plate of hot spaghetti in front of Bobby. “I tried to look through your fridge to see if I could make meatballs out of anything.. But I didn’t want to uh.. Have to ask questions.” I said, awkwardly. “Oh, I did find parmesan though, but I’d check the date on it if I were you.” I put the container down in front of him, and asked if he wanted anything to drink. Two bottles of beer came out of the fridge, and I sat in the chair across from him with my own plate of spaghetti. I noticed he had a bit of a bewildered look on his face. “Is everything okay? You look like you’ve never seen pasta.” He made eye contact and said quietly, “I’m good, jus’ been a long time since anybody’s cooked for me.” I started on my pasta just before saying, “well no promises it's any good, but you’d better eat before it gets cold. I take it we have a lot of ground to cover on this whole monster thing.” At that, he smiled and nodded his head, and I could swear I saw something bittersweet in his expression. I made a mental note to make a grocery list for the boys when they got back so I could cook for them more often. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright so I forgot that in Season 5 where this is taking place, Bobby is in a wheelchair. I adjusted the next chapters for that, but I may have to go back and change some details in the previous ones to accommodate. Sorry :/


	5. Noisome

The next morning came, and Bobby woke me around 6 a.m. I showered, got dressed, and came downstairs to find an arsenal strewn across his desk, along with bottles and flasks of unknown liquids. There were all sorts of books and notes stacked high on his chair, and he sat beside the desk, arms crossed. “Took you long enough. Let’s get started.” With a deep breath, I started to look around at all of the things laid out for me. “Where do we start?” I asked, looking at him as I traced my fingers along the edge of a strange knife. He sighed, “That’s a great question.” I pulled up two chairs, opened the first journal, and suddenly we were off. By noon, I had covered nearly 20 pages, and decided to organize them by monster. Each page was a profile on different monsters and spirits, how they behaved, what they looked like, what their “mojo” was, the characteristics of their victim pool, and right at the bottom of each page, I made sure to write in large letters exactly how Bobby said to kill each one. “You know, Bobby, I have a triple degree and I was working on my masters before Castiel brought me here. And somehow, this is way more interesting than anything I have EVER learned in school.” I said to him, finishing off the last page of notes on monster profiles. 

“Yeah, well it ain’t gonna be so interesting when something’s got its jaws on you.” He said, seriously. “But I gotta say, it’s refreshing to teach this to someone who actually listens.” 

I had been taking more notes on incantations, spells, and longest of all, angels and demons. By 6, I had filled well over half of the journal I had started, and my hand was very sore. This sure as hell was a crash course, but I had notes to review, as well as a metric shit ton of homework. Bobby had given me a stack nearly my height of ancient books and journals on all things hunting. I think I made him happy though, because something about old books has always made me giddy, and when he started to stack them in front of me, the look on my face must have been what made him laugh. “You remind me of Sam. The not-so-little nerd always gets excited over stuff like this too.” 

By 8, there was a half-eaten box of pizza sitting on the stove, Bobby was glued to the news, and I was curled up on the couch in the library, digging into one of the old journals from the top of the stack. 

The next morning, Bobby woke me from the couch, pulling me out of the little pile of books and journals I had finished before crashing the night before. Then, we got right back to it. I opened the other journal, and decided to make this one all things logistics, because Bobby was going on and on about aliases, covers, disguises, hacking phone calls, traffic cameras, and credit cards. He showed me all of his fake badges, and I wrote down a list of all of the IDs I should probably have made. He talked about code words, making me write all of them down, and then spend fifteen minutes memorizing each one. Then onto research, contacts, how to handle police and FBI, how to talk to witnesses, and how to handle people who didn’t understand the supernatural when out on a case. He told me stories from all of his years hunting, and even a few about Sam and Dean. I couldn’t help but be impressed with Bobby and the boys, I mean… This has been their entire life. I started to ask about their parents, but I was shut down pretty quickly by Bobby.  _ Must be a sore spot. Mental note: Don’t ask.  _

Around 2, Bobby said, “Alright, now we’re gonna get down to the nitty gritty. Don’t expect any ride alongs any time soon, but we need to make sure you can protect yourself.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I mean, I’m gonna teach you how to handle a gun, and how to use a knife. We’re gonna spend some time workin’ on your fightin’ moves.” He said, making his way towards the desk.

“Oh, well that shouldn’t be too bad.” I said, relieved.

“That’s what you think, but it ain’t as easy as it looks.” He said. I was a little insulted that he was underestimating me, but I couldn’t blame him. I definitely don’t look the type, but “Bobby, I know how to shoot already,” I said. He raised his eyebrows. “Shooting cans in your backyard once or twice don’t mean you know how to shoot.” I shot him a look, a little frustrated. “No, I mean I know how to shoot. My dad made me learn before I could even remember, I’ve been a marksman for almost 20 years.” He looked shocked. “I mean, I haven’t practiced much for the last 5 years give or take so I might be rusty, but at least you won’t have to teach me much.” He still looked at me like I was just a kid, and said, “You never know. But if you think you can, show me how to-” I interrupted him by taking the handgun from his grip before he could even finish his sentence. I’ve had way too many men try to explain guns to me, so I said, “Fine,” as I checked the safety, pulled back the slide, and took the round from the chamber. I ejected the magazine, and showed it to him. “Semi-automatic nine milimeter, compact.” I held up the bullet I took from the chamber. “And judging by the primer, I’m guessing you packed these yourself?” He smiled like a kid on Christmas as he said, “Sure did!” I chuckled a bit. They’re never expecting me to actually know my way around a firearm, so it’s always fun to see their reaction when I show them that I do. “Will you pass me that .45?” I asked, as I slid the magazine back into the gun in my hand. We traded, and I took it from him, doing a small inspection. It was an old colt, an M1911. It was black, with a wood finish on the stock. I looked up at him and asked, “Any reason you’re not using hollow points?” He looked thoughtful, “No, actually.. That’s probably a good idea.” I smirked, “Especially considering you shoot monsters for a living.” 

“Nobody pays me for it, idjit.” He responded. I chuckled a bit. “You must’ve had one hell of an old man.” He said, looking me in the eyes. I looked down. “Yeah.. something like that.” I tried not to show it, but I hate talking about my father. “When’d you first learn to shoot?” He asked, trying to distract me from the obviously tense subject. 

“My brother tells me I was four when I started. I barely even remember taking the shot, but I’ll never forget the gun. It was a .357 Smith and Wesson six shot. I loved that thing, but I’m told I hit the 8 ring and never looked back.” I remembered, trying to push down the creeping thoughts that my brother was probably looking for me. “Mind if I take this for a spin?” I asked, motioning to the .45 still in my hand. Bobby looked excited, “Hell yeah, let me grab my coat.”

When we got outside into his scrap yard and got the target set up, I finally noticed that it wasn’t winter here. It was crisp and the leaves were turning, but to my surprise there wasn’t any snow in sight.  _ How did I not notice this before?  _ We were out there for about an hour, as I regained some of my old confidence and skill with the firearm. I actually really liked what I had in my hand, and at some point, Bobby looked at the target in front of me and said, “Well hell, that thing hasn’t been shot that nicely in years. She’s all yours, Noah.” I smiled and thanked him, looking at the two inch grouping I had finally managed to get back. I told him I knew how to shoot, but I guess I forgot to mention I was actually pretty good at it. We were interrupted by his cell phone ringing, and as he answered it, his face completely changed. He made his way quickly back towards the house, talking angrily about a colt. I wondered what this could be about, as I packed up everything we had brought out, and started after him.

Hours later, I was standing awkwardly in the library with Sam and Dean, as Bobby fiddled with a camera, and a woman who was introduced to me as Ellen sat in the kitchen with Castiel, and who I was told is her daughter, Jo, taking shots together. I tried my best to stay out of the way, and I definitely didn’t think now was the time to ask questions, but from what I gathered listening from the corner, they had been given a gun from a demon named Crowley. The gun was supposed to be able to kill the devil, and Dean, Sam, Ellen, and Jo were making their way to Carthage, where they thought they would be able to find him and kill him once and for all. I didn’t say anything, but I had a horrible feeling in my gut that something really bad was going to happen, because although I had no experience with the supernatural, they were talking about Lucifer.. I mean, the actual devil. There’s no way that’s just going to go well for them, right? Everything about the night was tangibly bittersweet, and I could tell this was almost like a family gathering, in some sort of twisted way that I couldn’t quite understand. Sam and Dean were having a mildly heated discussion at the desk, and I tried my best not to eavesdrop. Before I knew it, Dean was walking towards Jo in the kitchen. From what I saw, he was trying to flirt, and was being hilariously rejected, but instead of laughing, I just turned towards Sam, not knowing what to say. “You look nervous.” He said, taking a swig of his beer. “Yeah.. a little.” I responded. He didn’t say anything back, so I continued, “I just uh.. I want you guys to come back, you know? In one piece.” He smiled slightly, looking towards the floor. “Yeah. Me too, Noah.” He sounded unsure. “You will come back, right?” I said, and I know I probably sounded like a little kid, but I couldn’t help it. I’d only known the boys for a week, but from what I’ve learned about them, I can’t deny that they’re heroes. They don’t deserve to be ripped apart by the devil, and I knew that much for sure. Before he could respond, Bobby was gathering everyone for a picture, wheeling his way towards the corner. Ellen was protesting, but they all gathered nonetheless. Suddenly, his camera fell from the tripod, and Dean and Jo both started to quip at bobby. “Here, I’ve got it!” I said, picking up the camera amongst their serious conversation. I held it up as they all looked towards me. Castiel was saying, “Bobby’s right. Tomorrow we hunt the devil. This is our last night on Earth.” They all looked solemn, not a smile in sight, and unsure of what to say or do, I just clicked the camera and took the photo. 

A little while later, just before it seemed like everyone was turning in, or getting ready to, I heard heated chatter from the kitchen. I padded my way in, quietly, trying not to get in the middle of anything. It was Dean and Castiel.

“So what, we’re just supposed to go on a freakin’ suicide mission tomorrow without her then? I thought you said she was supposed to have a hand in all of this!” Dean was closing in on Castiel. “I understand your frustration, Dean, but she’s not ready. I’m afraid she may just get herself killed.. Or worse.” He responded gravely. “What the hell do you mean ‘or worse’ Cas? You’re gonna have to tell me who or what the hell she is because you can’t just expect us to keep her here for you without knowing, man. I know there’s something you’re not telling us, and I know it ain’t good.” Cas struggled for a moment with words, as I listened from just behind the entryway. “It’s just.. Dean.. There’s some things I’m still unsure of myself, some things I can’t tell you right now, and-” Dean interrupted him, “Can’t or won't?” There was no hesitation before Castiel responded, “Both. You’re going to have to just trust me.” Dean was getting increasingly heated, “Trust you? Trust you, Cas? We’re about to go on a death mission, and the one thing you seem to think is worth protecting, the one person you’re so sure is supposed to play a part in stopping all this is staying behind. You think that’s supposed to make me feel good? You’re telling me I’m supposed to trust you when I know you’re lying to my face?” My face was starting to flush with guilt, and something told me this wasn’t Castiel’s fault.. Something made me feel like it was mine. Dean’s anger was growing, so I crept around the corner, and said in a nervous voice, “I’m sorry, Dean.” The angel looked at me with concern, but Dean just looked angrier than I’d seen him yet. “You’re sorry?  _ You’re  _ sorry?” I stammered to say something before he interrupted me again, “No, you know what? No. This is ridiculous. MY FAMILY is about to go and risk their lives to try and stop this, and you, YOU who got dumped in our living room because supposedly they brought you from a WHOLE OTHER DAMN UNIVERSE to help, are staying behind the front lines. Why would the angels go to all the trouble to go pick your ass up for this when you don’t do anything but stay behind, huh?” I was shaking at this point, afraid of the way he was walking towards me, yelling at me. What had I done? Was it something I said, did, something I couldn’t do?  _ What the hell am I supposed to be doing here? _ “Answer me!” He snapped. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, but I don't know.” His face was still furious. “Of course you don’t.” He said in a low voice. “Look, I can’t say I understand, this is probably terrifying for you, Dean. Hell, I’m scared  _ for  _ you, and Sam, and I’m apparently not even going with you. I wish I knew what I was supposed to do, I wish I could help, but I’m nothing right now. I’m sorry.” Dean’s face softened a bit at that, and he put his hands on his temples, taking a deep sigh. “No, I’m sorry. This isn’t your fault, Noah.” But at this point, I was upset, “How is it not my fault? You're right, Dean, I’m apparently supposed to be some part of this, but I’ve just been here sitting on my thumbs. I’m useless, and I know that, and I wish it could be different but it’s not and-” “Hey.” Castiel interrupted. “That’s enough. Now I suggest we all get some rest, tomorrow is going to be a.. Long day.” Dean nodded, the traces of frustration with the angel still visible, but with that statement, I turned on my heel, and made my way to bed. It took me a long time to fall asleep, however, because the thoughts in my head just kept racing.  _ Why am I here? _

The boys, Ellen, and Jo, departed the next morning, and I heard their hesitant and nervous exchange of goodbyes with Bobby. I stayed as far away as possible, not wanting to intrude on something so heavy. The rest of the day with Bobby was silent. Him and I were digging through books upon books trying to gather as much information as we could on Lucifer, reapers, and eventually, we started looking into Death himself. “Bobby, look at this. I think I might have something about Carthage,” He looked up. “There was a battle there during the civil war, it says here one of the bloodiest. That’s something, right?” Bobby barely looked at me, “Give me that. Find out where this happened.” I nodded my head, “Okay, I’m on it.” 

After a little while, we heard something stirring over Bobby’s old radio. He wheeled over in a hurry, uncovering it and responding. It was Dean, and something was wrong. Really wrong. I heard something along the lines of, “It’s Jo.. I don’t think she’s..” and my heart sank. She was so sweet the night before, and I could tell she was smart, tough.  _ I wonder if I should start praying..  _ I thought to myself. Listening to Bobby talk to Dean over the radio, the tension in the room like a wire, I could hear the love in his voice for the boys, and I started to shatter. I was praying silently, for them to come back, for everything to be okay, for this to all be over. I’d barely been here a week, and I couldn’t explain it but I knew right there I didn’t want them to get hurt.. I wanted them to come  _ home.  _ Come back to Bobby, to me, in one piece. I started to tune out what they were saying under the thoughts racing through my mind, but I was brought back by Bobby saying that Lucifer was trying to “raise death.” Like, the angel of death, according to Bobby, the “big daddy reaper.” I heard Dean at one point say, “Hell, I’ve died several times myself,” and made a mental note to ask about that later, if..  _ When  _ him and Sam got back. 

Bobby and Dean pieced together that Lucifer was trying to summon Death where that civil war battle went down, and that’s where they needed to go. Everything was a blur after that, with the worry, and the frantic research to find something,  _ anything _ to help the boys. Before I had even noticed it was dark, it was 10 p.m. Then midnight, and by that point, Bobby and I were sitting by the radio, phones in our hands, waiting for the boys to call, to tell us something good. For hours, our hearts were in our throats. We heard nothing and it was well past 3 in the morning. Still sitting, still waiting, still hopeful, I looked over at Bobby and realized his eyes were red, like he was trying to hold from crying. I wanted to say something, anything, to tell him that it would be okay, that they would be back, but I just couldn’t find the words. I was starting to think we had lost them, but in that moment, we heard the engine of Dean’s Impala pulling into the drive. I leaped out of my seat, and Bobby raced towards the door, and upon throwing it open, we found ourselves face-to-face with Sam and Dean. The relief washed over me at the sight of the two, sore and bloody as they were at leas they were here. But Ellen and Jo weren't with them, and the panic started to rise in me again. There was a long moment of silence, before Bobby finally spoke, “Where’s Ellen and Jo?” I realized I was holding my breath. Sam looked down at his muddy boots, and Dean put his hand over his face before just nodding his head. I realized that both the boys had been crying, and now I was too, silently. 

I spent the rest of the night pouring glass after glass of whiskey for the men, and myself, admittedly. By dawn, we were all silently gathered around Bobby’s television, watching the news coverage of the aftermath caused by Death’s rise. Bobby held in his hands the photo I had taken just the night before of all of them, and looked at it for a moment, before tossing it into the burning fireplace. I wanted to try to save it, to tell him he should keep it, but I stopped myself. It wasn’t my place. I just watched as the men all looked down, distraught and destroyed at the loss of their friends--no--their family. All I could think was how sorry I was that I hadn’t been there. I looked up at Sam, the devastation subsiding, but pain still visible on his face. He looked almost disappointed in himself, as if this was all his fault. Dean, however, looked tense, angry. His jaw was set, and the pain in his eyes darkened them. He was bruised, and I could tell that he was in pain from his shoulder and his back. I'm not entirely sure what happened that night- actually, I have no idea. All I know is that it was bad, and it seemed like they were all too used to bad things happening to them.


End file.
